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Early intervention: Why I Teach All My Caregivers to Use Self-Talk and Parallel-Talk

Writer's picture: ITS, PLLC.ITS, PLLC.

Updated: Jul 27, 2020

Self-talk and parallel-talk are two strategies I teach all caregivers when working with their toddler. The two strategies go hand-in-hand with each other and can greatly increase the language your child is exposed to during the day.


Self-Talk is the act of narrating your own actions, thoughts, and experiences. Talk about what you’re doing: while you fold laundry, make lunch, play with your child, even while cleaning. Use simple, child-friendly language such as “I’m making pancakes, MMMM.” You can describe what you are seeing, smelling, and feeling. Some examples are below.

Action Example

Playing with blocks “I’m stacking blocks. I’ll put pink on top. I have three blocks.”

Baking cookies “I’m stirring the batter. MMMM the cookies smell good.”

Washing dishes “I’m going to wash the dishes. First, I’ll add soap. Now I'm

using the sponge. Scrub scrub scrub. Oh bubbles, pop, pop.”


Parallel-talk is the act of narrating your child’s actions. This strategy has the same principals as Self-talk utilizing short, child-friendly phrases however, instead of narrating your actions you will describe what your child is doing. An example would be “You’re stacking blocks. You put pink on top. Wow! you made a tower.” You can also describe what they are seeing, smelling, and feeling. Here are some examples:

Action Example

Playing with blocks “You have a blue block. Wow you built a tall tower. You put the

block on top.”

Baking cookies “You’re stirring the batter. You have the spoon. Pour the chocolate

chips in.”

Washing dishes “You put soap in the sink. You see the blue sponge. The water is

warm. Splash! You put the cups on the shelf.”


Things to remember:


· Be enthusiastic and animated. This will help to hold your child’s attention and encourage

them to focus on your words.

· Use your normal voice with real words. Don’t use ‘baby talk’ or ‘baby voice’.

· Use short, child-friendly phrases.

· Don’t expect your child to imitate you. These strategies increase your child’s exposure to

language and vocabulary. A child needs to hear a word in context to be able to understand

it and then eventually use it in their speech.

· Incorporate verbs (throw, jump, pop) and prepositions (in, on, under).

· Talk about what your child is interested in. Don’t try to use these strategies to pull their

attention away from something they are enjoying playing with or truly interested in. For

example, if they are having fun playing with blocks, don’t get a baby doll from their toy

chest and try to get them interested in the doll. Let them play with the blocks until they

naturally transition to another activity.

· You can use these strategies naturally throughout your day with all activities. Your child

isn’t too young for these strategies. You can start using self-talk and parallel-talk when

your child is an infant.

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